we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
