I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
