dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
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