One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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