hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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