discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
