? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
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