I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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