You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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