As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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