i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
