what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
