I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
