nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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