It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
