My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
