fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
