im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
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