We won't sleep together?
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
50% drunk capacity currently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
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