Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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