none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
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