uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
