ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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