my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
