I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
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