ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
