See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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