She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
