I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize