He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
