i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
