Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
