Umm I'm too high to move.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
