Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
