i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Randomize