problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
