What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
