My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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