I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
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I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
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My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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