there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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