thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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