Your face is a jimmy john
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
