Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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