Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
being pregnant is like rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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