My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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