dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
