Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
