Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
