Ambien. No doubt about it.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
