Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
