she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize